JANE SAYS: If your son gets his mitts on your ring and gives it to his girlfriend, it will be hers to keep. Whether they stay together or not, she is not obliged to give it back.Therefore, it’s vital that you think very carefully before making your next move.Naturally, you want your boy to succeed and be happy in life, but you cannot allow him to lean on you and make you feel uncomfortable.You enjoyed a very special bond with your late grandmother.
She stuck to her principles and chose you to be the recipient instead of her own daughter.That means something.
Your son may be keen to pin down his girlfriend, but if he has no money, how can he contemplate an engagement and eventual marriage?Doesn’t he need to get his ducks in a row and start earning and saving?Talk to him about this, adult to adult.
What are his long-term plans regarding work and future funding?Also, if he’s “desperate” then she’s going to sense that desperation a mile off – and won’t find a proposal flattering or attractive.My take on this is that you shouldn’t hand over your ring.
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