Hollywood consequences Love

What sharing a suitcase really means for a relationship

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telegraph.co.uk

[TERENCE: I saved us 120 quid. Take that, O’Leary] I know. Tightwad Tez booked the tickets without me. As a consequence, of the requisite 20kg, Terence was allowed 4.3kg, pretentious Proustian reading matter included.

This feat was only possible given his soap-dodger status. Meanwhile, I was forced to squeeze nine days’ ensembles, novels, sunblock and slap into the remainder.

Ultra-lite obsessive that he is, Terence even boasts a device to check weight in advance, à la the Pompeian fresco of Priapus weighing his own member.

Negotiations were savage – not all of his injuries are mosquito bites.Still, it’s a symbol of a transformation I had noted before our great escape.

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