Dear Richard Madeley: 'My friend has publicly accused my husband of being a snob'
telegraph.co.uk– Marilyn, via emailIt does you credit that you want to take up the cudgels on your husband’s behalf, but I honestly wouldn’t.
The insult was directed at him, not you. It’s his decision whether or not to take things further, and he’s magnanimous enough to have decided to forgive and forget.I get quite a few letters similar to yours, Marilyn, asking me for advice on settling scores.
Almost without exception, I take the same line as your husband. Forgiveness is invariably the wiser path to choose. The danger in returning to an old slight is that you risk igniting a feud, and feuds are like bushfires – incredibly hard to extinguish once they get going.
Feuds are exhausting, too. They simultaneously suck up emotional energy and drip poison into a festering wound.People who make insulting comments of this kind are usually motivated to do so by insecurity.
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