Holly Madison doesn’t mince words about her experience at the Playboy Mansion during the Secrets of Playboy docuseries, which premieres January 24 on A&E.
While she was Hugh Hefner’s main girlfriend, Holly reveals that things got so intense in the house with the other women that she thought about drowning herself. “I remember there was a point in time a couple of years in.
After we had gone out and after we had all been in the bedroom. Everybody’s leaving and walking out, and I was in the bathtub.
And I just wanted to drown myself. I just felt like I was in this cycle of misery,” Holly says. She adds, “And, you know, those feelings would never last long, but you have those moments, like what did I gain from this experience?
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